[intermediate] How to get better at self love

★ Boil down to something 본질이 ~ 이다

If a situation or problem boils down to something, that is the main reason for it.

Ex) The problem boils down to one thing – lack of money.

 

★ Embrace 받아들이다

To accept something enthusiastically

Ex) This was an opportunity that he would embrace.

 

★ At your worst 최악의 경우

Least favorable, or least desirable outcome possible.

Ex) Although I didn’t study for the test, I figured I’d get a B at the worst.

 

★ Unconditional 무조건적인

Complete and not limited in any way

Ex) Children need unconditional love.

 

★ Dwell on 곱씹다

To keep thinking or talking about something, especially something bad or unpleasant.

Ex) “Let’s not dwell on the past,” she said. 

 

★ Acknowledge 인정하다

To accept, admit or recognize something.

Ex) She acknowledged that she had been at fault. 

 

★ Have a grudge 원한을 품다

To continue feeling an old resentment for someone.

Ex) Amanda still has a grudge against me for refusing to lend her that money.

 

★ stream of consciousness 의식의 흐름

a narrative mode or method that attempts to depict the thoughts and feelings which pass through the mind

Ex) One way to improve your writing skills in general, is to write in the stream of consciousness style.

 

★ peel off 벗기다

to remove the outermost layer of something

Ex) The paint is starting to peel off.

 

★ complement 보완하다

add to something in a way that enhances or improve it, make perfect

Ex) The illustrations complement the text.

 

Quizzes

1.I thought about it and generally it ________ down to these three things.

2.You have to learn how to forgive yourself. This means not being so _______ ____ yourself.

3.When you have an argument with someone or you have a ________ or there’s some sort of unsettled situation, that occupies _______ in your mind.

 

Questions

1.Can you forgive your own mistakes?

2.What do you do to make yourself feel better?

3.What did you learn from this video?

 

Script

What does it mean to love yourself? And how can we love ourselves better? I was having this conversation with a really good friend of mine recently, and she asked me, “What does self love look like to you?“ I thought about it and generally it boils down to these three things. So first of all, to love yourself fully is to accept and embrace yourself for everything that you are. Including your strengths, your weaknesses, your flaws, everything. You have to love yourself at your best and love yourself even at your worst. It’s about just embracing who you are and owning it, and not wanting to be anyone else and have a different life, because you should love and accept your life. Love is unconditional, so whatever happens, you still have to love yourself.

 

Number two is to learn to forgive, and this comes in two parts. The first part is: You have to learn how to forgive yourself. This means not being so hard on yourself. If you ever make a mistake or mess up, don’t dwell on it. Just acknowledge it, learn from it, and move on.

 

The second part of forgiveness is to learn to forgive others who have hurt you, even if they haven’t apologized or even if they don’t deserve it. This is hard and it’s tricky but if you can do it, then it’s extremely powerful. When you have an argument with someone or you have a grudge or there’s some sort of unsettled situation, that occupies space in your mind and there’s just this negative energy where you’re always hurting because you haven’t gotten over that situation. So you want to learn to forgive others, not necessarily because they deserve it but because you love yourself too much to let yourself keep hurting because of that situation. It doesn’t have to be a verbal connection, you don’t have to tell them that you’ve forgiven them. It’s more for yourself that you’ve forgiven this person and let go of the situation, just so that you can have inner peace, because forgiving yourself and forgiving others is learning to treat yourself well and it’s loving yourself, because you don’t want to keep hurting over anything that’s happened in the past.

 

Number three is to take the time to really listen to yourself and do what’s best for you. In loving yourself, you have to really know yourself and through that, you can do what’s best. So I do this through writing. Writing is my way of talking to myself. I have a bunch of journals and I do stream of consciousness writing which means I just write whatever flows out of me, whatever is off the top of my mind and I keep going. And I keep writing, writing, and writing until the voice inside of me comes out. It takes a while to peel off the layers of what’s on the surface. You know, on the surface, we think about our daily lives(life라고 말함) and the things that we have to do, but if you keep listening to yourself and keep digging, then you start to find the most honest core of yourself and the voice that is truly you. So that’s how I get to know myself, and I listen to what I’m really feeling and what I really want. Through that, I try to take action and do the things that complement what I truly want and what’s best for me. So those are my three criteria for self love and how to love yourself better.

 

Answers

Boils

Hard on

Grudge

Space